just because I know you are going to see this

i feel nothing, not a thing.

Grad & CanadaDay- an update for anyone following

I don't know if you can change things, but it's a drop in the ocean.

Lately every little thing has been changing. Spinning, and evolving into something new, and in our case something unfavorable. I am unable to say anything with you around, speak my mind, for if I do I am told what I do and what I think is wrong. I also understand you are intelligent but lately, your logic has been in the wrong place and the choices you have been making aren't much better either. I don't think you understand the severity of what you are doing to me, doing to us and I want it to stop. You know that place between consciousness and unconsciousness? That is the only place where I feel safe right now. For every time my eyes are open I want to look better for you, see you smile and see you happy and when my eyes are closed and I am dreaming of you, and how I don't deserve to be treated the way I am. Try close you eyes and end up in that state and try figure out what it is you need to do to fix this. Because I am done, I have nothing more to give.